Dependence - Independence - Interdependence
24 February 2008Ever heard someone say "He’s 20, but he acts like he’s 16.", showing that age is not a true indicator of maturity? What then, defines maturity?
As we go through life, we have several stages of maturity.
Dependence - From the time we are born, we need those around us to survive. Infants need constant supervision and nourishment, toddlers need to be sheltered from the new dangers they can start to touch, and adolescent children need food, shelter, and water provided for them.
Independence - As we enter our teenage years, the fierce struggle for independence begins. "I can do this on my own", we tell ourselves. We may still need our parents for shelter and food, but we resent the idea. We struggle to define our selves as an independent being, free from the need of external support. Teenagers everywhere can relate at some level, and parents are challenged all across the world with the transition from dependence to independence.
Some of us charge into independence with such veracity that we may cause pain for those along with us on our journey. We may disregard the thoughts of others and not understanding the value of relationships. After staking your claim in the ground in the name of independence, you realize you are all alone, and it hits you.
Your dreams are much bigger now, and you can’t do it on your own. Your vision has exceeded your ability to execute. Great problem to have, and it’s time for some help. And you realize, there are other people that need help too. The light bulb goes off. We can all help each other to succeed by working together and embracing each other’s success.
Interdependence — is the top level of maturity where you focus your efforts on building a set of relationships around you of people that can help. Your dreams are too big to be accomplished alone, and so are the dreams of those around you.
Invest in those around you, build a circle of relationships by helping others understand what it is that they want and giving them the tools to achieve their success.
I suggest reading Stephen Covey’s The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People for more detail.
on February 24th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you.
Allen Taylor
on August 9th, 2008 at 8:56 am
Wonderful definitions! It’s amazing how many people want to stay in the "independent" stage and never mature to the next level.